Sunday, March 10, 2019

Billy Possum Destroys the Bird Feeder (again) - rhyming doggerel (or possumerrel)

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

Billy Possum Destroys the Bird Feeder in the Night

(Again)

That climbing ratitude
In nightly interlude
And moral turpitude
Eats all the birdy-food

(I haven’t thought up an appropriate amphimacer [yes, I had to look that up] “ude” rhyme for the destruction of a bird feeder, but if I do it will go here)

Thus shows his gratitude
Oh! What an attitude!
I speak with acritude
Thus ends this platitude


For the true adventures of Billy Possum, see Thornton W. Burgess’ wonderful Mother West Wind stories.


Saturday, March 9, 2019

"Only the Solitary Seek the Truth" - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

Workers of the World, Untie

“Every herd is a refuge for giftlessness…Only the solitary seek the truth,
and they break with all those who don't love it sufficiently.”

― Boris Pasternak, Doctor Zhivago

You cannot write with your fist clenched in hate
You cannot sing with a conscripted voice
You cannot dance if you are made to march
You cannot love if your heart is not free

You cannot think if they slogan your mind
You cannot play if they deny your joy
You cannot dream if they program your spirit
You cannot pray if they poison your soul

You are an artist, a seeker of truth:
And no one should finish this line for you

Friday, March 8, 2019

The Happy Killer Who Dug The Lovin' Spoonful - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

The Happy Killer Who Dug The Lovin’ Spoonful

Caught in the net of conscription, most of us
Some joining up before being press-ganged
Why wait to be pushed into your own death
When you can push yourself, and wonder why

An E-4 not yet thirty - we called him Pops
A curly-haired kid named Skip - his head blown off
That Army guy who let go of the boat and drowned
The happy killer who dug The Lovin’ Spoonful

Caught in the net of conscription, most of us
Along with Miss March, withering in the heat

Thursday, March 7, 2019

My Weather Balloon - column

Lawrence Hall, HSG
Mhall46184@aol.com

It Fell From the Skies!

But don’t worry - the “it” was an iMet-4 radiosonde, tethered to a nifty parachute, and at a few ounces it would hardly have disturbed a flower petal.

Early on Sunday morning I, y’r ‘umble rustic scrivener, found a little parachute alongside a country road. The parachute had a harness and a line dangling, and atop it a burst balloon. I followed the line into the weeds, expecting to find a weather service device, a little camera, or a science experiment.

In the event, it was two of the three, a little plastic box on which was lettered “IF FOUND, PLEASE CALL (XXX-XXX-XXXX).” On the other side the maker’s label read “iMet-4” and “InterMet Systems.” Alongside the label was a row of indicators marked “402MHz” to “405Mx,” and a button for setting the frequency. On top was a connector of some sort and the attachment for the lanyard. On the bottom protruded a six-inch flexible antenna.

The parachute was of a very tight weave; from it was suspended a blue plastic ring built to accept the attachment of various scientific instruments.

Finally, there was a burst balloon. When the balloon failed, everything floated gently down to the weeds along my road.

The concept of the radiosonde dates from the 1930s, and was invented simultaneously in the USA and in the unfortunate Soviet Union.

This particular model, from International Met Systems of Grand Rapids, Michigan, measures temperature, humidity, air pressure, geopotential height (I don’t know what that means), wind speed, and wind direction, and sends this information constantly to its receiving station.

And while we were asleep this particular I-Met 4 spent the night in the silences high above the ground, swinging from its balloon while sniffing the air and feeling the wind and thinking happy electronic thoughts.

Dr. Don Conlee of God’s University, Texas A & M, sent me an electrical note thanking me for its recovery, and added: “We are involved in an experiment to better understand tornadoes in the SE U.S., and have been launching quite frequently of late.”

Given the deadly nature of tornadoes, we can all be grateful to Dr. Conlee, his students, and his fellow scientists for launching this little gadget and all its little electronic classmates from Easterwood Field in College Station to acquire knowledge that will save lives.

Dr. Conlee continued: “If you have a convenient way to return it to us…at A & M…that would be great. If not, I would suggest that you see if a local middle school or high school science teacher would like to take it, along with my contact information, and we can see how they might use it in the classroom to talk about weather/physics/etc.”

And so it was agreed. I have a young friend who teaches science and will take charge of the radiosonde for her students, and Dr. Conlee will send her and her students “…information about the launch, pictures of the data it collected, and maps that will be interesting.” Thus, the radiosonde will have contributed to civilization twice, first in the acquisition of knowledge that will help save lives, and then again through the intellectual enrichment of the young.

And that is The Aggie Way. Whoop!

When I was a lad I enjoyed science (until in the higher grades teachers messed it up with mathematics), and I would have had that single, tempting phillips screw out as soon as I could open up my Swiss Army Knife to see if there were any tiny little Martians aboard.

As it was, in my responsible old age I did not take the machine apart, though I did put it to my ear to listen for any secrets being beamed back out to space. It was silent, and there were no Martians.

Sigh.

Despite the intrusion of mathematics (maths are not in the Bible, you know), science is both useful and fun.

In this instance the radiosonde, its rigging, the blue plastic ring, the poofy parachute, and the balloon were also quite pretty. I wish I had seen them floating down through the sky because, as Blaise Pascal says, “the heart has its reasons, which the mind knows not.”

-30-



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Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

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and a manly group hug

Wednesday, March 6, 2019

My School of Thought - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

My School of Thought

We’ve heard of schools of thought for ideas sought -
Philosophy, history, music, and art -
Where everyone agrees that they are all smart
So I would like to build my own school of thought:

In the mornings the children will raise my flag
And all will pledge true allegiance to me
And in class children will look up to see
My thoughtful image, and they will brag

How everyone now thinks as I say they ought:
And that, dear friends, is my own school of thought!

Tuesday, March 5, 2019

Diskos et Calyx - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

Diskos et Calyx

The universe spirals through its starlit dance
Creation spins around, in, and down
Eternity circles the paten and cup

Miraculum

Eternity circles the paten and cup
Around and out and up, Creation spins
Through its starlit dance the universe spirals

Monday, March 4, 2019

Cooperating with the Feds in Exchange for Immunity - Limerick

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

Cooperating with the Feds in Exchange for Immunity
(and a book deal)


Dear Feds:

I wish to apply for immunity
Though I have done nothing with impunity
Show me how to conspire
So that I might acquire
Largess from the working community

Sincerely,

Lawrence Hall

Sunday, March 3, 2019

There Are Only Two Dreams - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

There Are Only Two Dreams

There are only two dreams: freedom and love
And if you wake exiled from Eden again
From a moment of exquisite happiness
Your dream was wonderfully, happily true

There are only two dreams: freedom and love
Any other topic is not a dream
But only the clamorings of others
Demanding always a piece of your soul

There are only two dreams: freedom and love -
Tears mean only that you must wait awhile

Saturday, March 2, 2019

The Sorceress of Santarem - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

The Sorceress of Santarem

Whatever happened to the sorceress?
The narratives leave her story unresolved -
Upon the Altar reposes the sacred Host
Before the Altar kneel graced penitents

But did the sorceress find mercy too
Or does she still cringe in her crusted cave
In a gully before the rubbish fires
Whose incense is the writhing smoke of Hell

Whatever happened to her life of blight -
Was she too wakened by that same true Light?





Suggested by a thought in a letter from Fr. Raphael Barousse, OSB

Friday, March 1, 2019

Looking for Something in a Burning Street

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol

Looking for Something in a Burning Street

He was looking for something in a burning street
Among blown wreckage and necrotic smoke
Among the drifting ashes and debris
Alone among grey-morning-crumbling stones

He later could not remember much of it
Among the empty greyness - were there dead?
Among the silences where screams had flown
Alone among accusers who weren’t there

“Don’t look for it. Go into solitude.
Don’t look for it. It will be found for you.”

Thursday, February 28, 2019

Emerging Writers - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

Emerging Writers

One reads of emerging writers
But from what do they emerge?

Wombs?
Tombs?
Rooms?

Cells?
Wells?
Shells?

Sins?
Bins?
Tins?

Canada?

So go ahead; emerge away
Then tell us what you have to say

Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Intensifying the Dallas Charter - a poem and a cloud of unknowing

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

Intensifying the Dallas Charter

The cultural filters are all in place
And truth, some say, is past its sell-by date
Weak hymns embalmed by hippies, and lost in space
Where time is always 1968

A poison-green tattoo on a fleshy back
No incense, but the Purell’s pretty strong
A ten-year-old gobbles his comfort snack
During Communion and a three-chord song

Our bishops quack and honk in flocks and herds -
We need a starets
                                      but all we get are words:


Intensify the Dallas Charter accountability focus accountability exclusively accountability collegial collective accountability responsibility address theme encounter dialectic collegiality variety universality unity flock dealing topic difficult reasons unexplored differences crisis difficult for bishops enable abusers gravely irreparably failures governance responsibility question engage conversation point brother problematic behavior cultivate culture correctio fraterna enables offending other recognize criticism opportunity to tasks related willingness personally mistakes to each other feeling maintain fraternal relationship cases we damaging weakness anecdotal parenthesis to his speech encounters course ministry recollection forgive counseling for healing discussing matter rationally headway realized psyche of the person measure semblance justice inability forgive his apparently perplexing consternating remarked noting changed personality of person realize humility mistakes learn mistakes better question unanswered unaddressed mistakes allowed consequences mishandling cases gathering conferences participants and journalists effective concrete measures combat scourge scandal technical theological sense term list reflection points adjunct secretary special portfolio combatting meeting chief architects roadmap for our discussion very, very concrete understatement seriously utter understatement things discussed follow-up meeting continued model of reform the so-called intensify the Dallas Charter metropolitan model metropolitan investigating disciplining wayward ecclesiastical provinces briefing responded you have to read the footnote disgrace investigations systemic coverup dismissed briefing expressed hope report position power prominence leadership structure report findings influence broader jurisdictions Accountability focus accountability exclusively accountability collegial collective accountability responsibility address theme encounter dialectic collegiality variety universality unity flock dealing topic difficult reasons unexplored differences crisis difficult for bishops enable abusers gravely irreparably failures governance responsibility question engage conversation point brother problematic behavior cultivate culture correctio fraterna enables offending other recognize criticism opportunity to tasks related willingness personally mistakes to each other feeling maintain fraternal relationship cases we damaging weakness anecdotal parenthesis to his speech encounters course ministry recollection forgive counseling for healing discussing matter rationally headway realized psyche of the person measure semblance justice inability forgive his apparently perplexing consternating remarked noting changed personality of person realize humility mistakes learn mistakes better question unanswered unaddressed mistakes allowed consequences mishandling cases gathering conferences participants and journalists effective concrete measures combat scourge scandal technical theological sense term list reflection points adjunct secretary special portfolio combatting meeting chief architects roadmap for our discussion very, very concrete understatement seriously utter understatement things discussed follow-up meeting continued model of reform the so-called Metropolitan model metropolitan investigating disciplining wayward ecclesiastical provinces briefing responded you have to read the footnote disgrace investigations systemic coverup dismissed briefing expressed hope report position power prominence leadership structure report findings influence broader jurisdictions accountable faithful promises episodes accountability supportive talking collegiality obligation misbehavior failures circumstances reputation representative discreet inquiries interview expression concern geographically confronted reported matter subject investigating disciplining malfeasance proposal wrongdoing explained carefully considered matter alternatives remarks paragraph rehearsed alternatives footnote 6 of text speeches delivered sessions briefing spoke involvement laity lay involvement transparency transparent offending other recognize criticism opportunity to tasks related willingness personally mistakes to each other feeling maintain fraternal relationship cases we damaging weakness anecdotal parenthesis to his speech encounters course ministry recollection forgive counseling for healing discussing matter rationally headway realized psyche of the person measure semblance justice inability forgive his apparently perplexing consternating remarked noting changed personality of person realize humility mistakes learn mistakes better question unanswered unaddressed mistakes allowed consequences mishandling cases gathering conferences participants and journalists effective concrete measures combat scourge scandal technical theological sense term list reflection points adjunct secretary special portfolio combatting meeting chief architects roadmap for our discussion very, very concrete understatement seriously utter understatement things discussed follow-up meeting continued model of reform the so-called Metropolitan model metropolitan investigating disciplining wayward ecclesiastical provinces briefing responded you have to read the footnote disgrace investigations systemic coverup dismissed briefing expressed hope report position power prominence leadership structure report findings influence broader jurisdictions accountable faithful promises episodes accountability supportive talking collegiality obligation misbehavior failures circumstances reputation representative discreet inquiries interview expression concern geographically confronted reported matter subject investigating disciplining malfeasance proposal wrongdoing explained carefully considered matter alternatives remarks paragraph rehearsed alternatives footnote 6 of text speeches delivered sessions briefing spoke involvement laity lay involvement transparency transparent intensify the Dallas Charter…

Tuesday, February 26, 2019

Theatrical Night at the Nudist Colony - a poem (of sorts)

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

Theatrical Night at the Nudist Colony

A beautiful girl

Pleasingly and teasingly
Naughtily and saucily
Wooingly and cooingly
Playfully and seductively

Puts her clothes back on

Monday, February 25, 2019

"All-Male Military Draft Ruled Unconstitutional" - intemperate doggerel

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

“All-Male Military Draft Ruled Unconstitutional”

Because nothing says democracy more
Than sending off the daughters of the poor
To die for Raytheon and General Dynamics

And for the President, whose manly sons
Shoot animals dead with their great big guns

But when the the bullets, bombs, and shells are raining
Those brave lads won’t be found in basic training

Since when it comes to the generals’ slaughter
They’ll send to her death your little daughter

And when the generalissimos yell “Go!”
Our Merovingian Congress won’t say “No”

They fight the wars with perks and private jets
As do their beribboned flag-rank house pets

And so our daughters are the harvest yield
That must forever rot in some foreign field 1

As for our leaders’ daughters, don’t be so hard -
Someone’s got to sun-bathe in Harvard Yard







1 cf. “The Soldier,” Rupert Brooke

Sunday, February 24, 2019

"Select Product and Begin Fueling" - Road Tripping Poem

Lawrence Hall, HSG
mhall46184@aol.com

“Select Product and Begin Fueling”

Gas, yes, but we need more products than that
For the Great American Road: check the water,
And check the oil, check the number of kids
Fighting with each other in the back seat

Select some Eagles tunes and fuel them too
Into the six-layer CD machine -
Let’s bust out of Texas and head for Horse Springs
Which isn’t there anymore, but Magdalena is

And they’ve got twenty-seven radio telescopes
Out on the plains to fuel our dreams and hopes

Saturday, February 23, 2019

For John Keats, +23 February 1821 - poem

Lawrence Hall, HSG
mhall46184@aol.com

For John Keats, +23 February 1821

Wanderer by moonlight, you never knew
That mellow autumn of elusive fame
Which you well-earned in your suffering youth
As you laboured in haste through hastening death

In haste to set in jeweled, sunlit lines
Each joyful day’s delight in nature and man
Before they faded into that long night -
You never knew what treasures you left to us

Then may your desperate pilgrimage to Rome
Lead you at last to more glorious Stairs

Friday, February 22, 2019

Pomona at Play - poem

Lawrence Hall, HSG
mhall46184@aol.com

Pomona at Play

Pomona dances among the apple trees
Light-footed through the glowing amber light;
At dusk, kissed by the last rain-drops, the breeze
Begins to sigh, and falls, to sleep the night.

And then pale Cynthia, in silver crowned,
Rises to breathe upon each leaf and flower
Her sacred mists, softly and softly around,
And blesses dreams through many a silent hour.

Bold Helios will wake the sleeping east
And laugh away the magic of the dark;
He sets out daylight as a merry feast
And measures out his work with compass and arc

But later, them, for sweet Pomona’s play
Now celebrates the golden end of day.

Thursday, February 21, 2019

Hey, Hey, We're the Monkees and not Wagner! - weekly column

Lawrence Hall, HSG
Mhall46184@aol.com

Hey, Hey, We’re the Monkees and Not Wagner!

Last week a 77-year-old man named Peter Dork died. 77-year-old men have been known to die from time to time, but this man was quite famous in his youth as a member of the musical group The Monkees (sic) and continued to work until his death.

The Monkees were cobbled together in the 1960s by television producers as a weekly series to profit from the popularity of The Beatles (sic). A popular nickname for The Beatles was the fab four, and so a snarky nickname for The Monkees was the pre-fab four. And that was true enough, but the scheme became more popular than anyone imagined it would be, and The Monkees, through their popular television series, records, screaming-teenie tours, movies, and reunions, made themselves a significant cultural artifact.

Through a series of casting calls and tryouts four young men - Peter Tork, Micky Dolenz, Michael Nesmith, and Davy Jones - were hired to grow bowl haircuts and play the monkees in the weekly series broadcast from 1965 - 1968. The producers employed the quick cuts, jerky movements, and minimal plotting of the Beatles’ movies with great success. The WannaBeatles were harmless good fun with the assembly-line teenie-bop music put upon them, and for a while the world sang along to “Hey, Hey, We’re the Monkees!”

Y’r ‘Umble Scrivener remembers an occasion in the middle of the night when the jolly Viet-Cong treated us to their own special music, and among the racket (as with Wagner, the V.C. liked it LOUD), a friend’s voice sang in a somewhat quavering but decidedly defiant counterpoint: “Hey, hey, we’re the Monkees…”

Back in the U.S.A. the sometimes Fractious Four were musically ambitious and wanted to make more serious music that the programmatic tinkerty-tonk promoted for the show. They often did not get along with each other and they certainly did not get along with the men who made them stars. Apparently none of their songs at that time featured gratitude as a topic.

Due to squabbles the show was canceled in 1968, and the lads continue to squabble as a group until 1971 when they pulled the metaphorical plug and pursued their own musical interests.

In the 1990s re-runs of the show on cable and satellite channels made The Monkees popular again, and for decades they made a number of reunion shows and fresh albums.

Y’r ‘umble scrivener was vaguely aware of popular music only because he couldn’t escape it in the a.m. radio subculture of the times, but could not distinguish The Monkees from The Beatles from The Eagles (let the reader react with shock and then disdain). Indeed, in his declining and / or golden years he has developed a fondness for German opera, and is happy to drive along to the tune of bellowing Wagnerians. His family is not happy about that, but his dachshunds, being good Germans, are cool with all the sturm und drang.

However, success must be applauded, and musical people advise me that The Monkees aren’t bad at all, and occasionally pretty good.

In sum, The Monkees were fun, and in a world where there is too much sadness, a bit of fun is good enough.

It is a truism that for those of a certain generation “I’m a Believer,” “Last Train to Clarksville,” “Pleasant Valley Sunday,” and “Hey, Hey, We’re the Monkees!” are essentials for the American road trip. For their grandchildren, nah, that’s MeeMaw and PawPaw music, and they retreat behind the cultural safety of their ear buds listening to God alone knows what beatnik-hippie stuff, eh?

-30-

A Penny Catechism Kind of Man - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com

A Penny Catechism Kind of Man

Simple enough, big print but no big words
Simple enough for me, few words in me
I love the silences, they speak to me
In the ridges and fens among my crops

Simple enough, a pipe down at the pub
Simple enough for me - Guinness or Pimms
I love a pint in the evenings with the lads
In the corner, well armed with pints and darts

Simple enough, big print but no big words
For a penny catechism kind of man