Friday, April 24, 2020

Harris County Judge Lena Hidalgo Sued over Face Mask Requirement - poem (of a sort)

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com







Harris County Judge Lena Hidalgo Sued over Face Mask Requirement
 
“Who was that masked man?”
 
-various minor characters in The Lone Ranger

Once upon a time masks were forbidden
Those fashion statements of outlaws and Klan
Whose faces and crimes they kept hidden
Behind funny facewear, like Batman
 
But the Hidalgo who rules over us
As if we were Spanish colonials
Dismisses our rights as superfluous
Written off by her edicts baronial

So speaking of masks – where is our Zorro?
To tell the Alcalde – “Masks no more-oh!”

 

 

(Relax, Ms. Grundy, it’s just a bit of fun with layered allusions to Texas history; I have my mask.)

Thursday, April 23, 2020

The Shifting Vocabulary of Whatever We're Calling That Disease This Week - weekly column

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com
23 April 2020

The Shifting Vocabulary of Whatever We’re Calling That Disease This Week

In the last few months all the peoples of the earth have been impacted by and are dealing with a disease that has killed thousands of our fellow humans – even a few supercilious Darwinians – and we don’t even agree on what to label it. Consider these many documented terms crowding up and down the steps of that Babylonian ziggurat:

Wuhan virus
Wuhan flu
Chinese virus
CCP Virus
Bat virus
Bat flu
Batflu
Corona virus
Coronavirus
CoronaVirus
Covid-19
COVID-19
COVID19
Covid19
SARS-CoV-2
C-19
C19

If we’re going to work together (or, rather, #together apart) in order to survive a certain disease, we should agree on what that disease is.

Another problem is the fuzzy filler-language of tired and inappropriate metaphors and allusions that block effective communications. Consider this limited sampling:

Wartime president
War footing
Our generation’s Pearl Harbor
Our generation’s Normandy
Our generation’s 9/11
War
Like World War II
In the trenches
Front lines
Frontlines
Silent enemy but an enemy

Instead of saying what an issue is, the lazy writer or speaker pulls from a lifetime of hand-me-down puffery to puff further nonsense. Consider the typical graduation speech (which we are unlikely to hear this year because of a disease, not because of a Nazi invasion) with its keys that are forever opening dreams or roads or rainbows or love, never anything, such a lock, that a key in fact opens.

Metaphorical language certainly has its purposes. One does not imagine, say, John Wayne as Marshal Cogburn calling out to Lucky Ned Pepper, “I disapprove of your inappropriate response to my notification of your lawful arrest predicated upon a federal warrant, you wretched man, and propose to counter your further criminal actions with all the power granted to me in my office under the sanctions of the law!” as an effective challenge.

When we speak of contracts, business, science, research, and health care (NOT “healthcare”), though, metaphors and careless language compromise effective communication and thus our purposes. Using language accurately is essential in most of life’s transactions, and it is certainly essential now.

-30-


Dragging Hoses on St. George's Day - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

Dragging Hoses

Drag those hoses when the weather is dry
April’s grass is paling, and oak leaves wither
All the new plantings cry for a drink of water
And the rains of winter have now retired

Drag those hoses when the morning is dry
Everyone wants some sort of validation:
A job, encouragement, a little support
For now, we just have to get on with life

Drag those hoses when the evening is dry
And pray for sweet rain from the reluctant sky


(Or dragon hoses - this is St. George's Day!)

Wednesday, April 22, 2020

Bidets as a Topic of Conversation - an awful limerick

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

Bidets as a Topic of Conversation

There was a French girl named Renee’
Who loved to pose on her bidet
Her vanity led
To a Playboy spread
But her movie career just washed away

Tuesday, April 21, 2020

"...the right of the people peaceably to assemble..." - copyrighted news photograph

 
Peaceably
 


(c) Joshua A. Bikel, The Columbus Dispatch, via Associated Press

Shelter in Place, Old Man - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com


Shelter in Place, Old Man
 
And now my duties are forbidden me
Even the volunteer programs have shut down
And I am left as a Finzi-Contini
At play in a garden, awaiting the worm

They tell me I’m too old, that I must stay home
(They didn’t tell me that in ’67)
Yevtushenko says that as we get older
We get honester. But that’s not enough
 
I wish I could sign on again, one last patrol -
But now all duties are forbidden me

Sunday, April 19, 2020

A Very Brief Review for GoodReads of Humphrey Carpenter's J.R.R. TOLKIEN: A BIOGRAPHY

J.R.R. Tolkien by Humphrey Carpenter

by    
This is a nice little biography for those who love Tolkien and the Inklings. Humphrey Carpenter's several biographies are always well-researched and, even when alluding to awkward moments in the subjects' lives, infinitely kind and generous.

As for the recent film, it fails in every way, in structure, lighting, plotting, and the now-obligatory intrusions of razzle-me / dazzle-me computer cartooning. One longs for a movie free of electrons. The biggest failing, however, one which stamps a veto on the entire project (which does feature some good moments), is the filmmakers' dishonesty and violation of artistic ethics in deleting Catholicism from Tolkien's life. One need not approve or disapprove of Catholicism to understand the lack of integrity here; Tolkien's faith, one which he believed his mother to have died for because of family persecution, was the basis of everything he believed, lived, and wrote.

The young actors are fine in their roles; they certainly deserved better of The Suits (only I suppose now they are not The Suits but rather The Tee-Shirts).

Sunday Morning Tornado Watch - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

Sunday Morning Tornado Watch

This is the only thing normal today:
A tornado watch on a Sunday in spring
I have shifted those famous Loose Objects
Into secure areas as best I could

Too bad we can’t shift the virus about
Stuff it into a rusted garbage bin
And set it out along the leafy lane
To wait for the men to haul it away

Liturgy on the telly, skies deadly grey -
How odd the things that are normal today

Saturday, April 18, 2020

The Only Man in the World Who Knows Nothing about How to Cure the Coronavirus or the Economy Recuses Himself - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

The Only Man in the World Who Knows Nothing about How to Cure the Coronavirus or the Economy Recuses Himself

“Twilight it is, and the far woods are dim”
-Masefield

The book is put aside, the cigar is lit
Old scotch rolled thoughtfully within the glass
As fireflies flit among the apple trees
And Cat carnivorously craves a careless bird

Sweet April’s evening air is exactly right
I could bring the portable radio outside
For a little light jazz – or maybe not
The firstling stars are musical enough

To accompany the memories, and, yes,
Masefield says it ever so much better

Friday, April 17, 2020

The Cherry Tree Who Visited an Apple Orchard and Decided to Stay - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

The Cherry Tree Who Visited an Apple Orchard and Decided to Stay

In the blowing-wind dusk the cherry tree waves
Far more than the orchard’s Anna-apple trees
Into whose company it has intruded itself
This party-crasher who has somehow moved in

While the cherry tree waves its leaves about
A single cricket hidden in the grass
Chirrups an evening hymn of just one note
As the work-weary birds wing to the woods

The last sunbeams have climbed up and away
And winked goodnight to this cherry-tree day

Thursday, April 16, 2020

Historic Sites Archaeology or Finding Neat Stuff in the Ground - weekly column

Lawrence (Mack) Hall, HSG
Mhall46184@aol.com

Historic Sites Archaeology

Or

Finding Neat Stuff in the Ground

Long, long ago in a land far, far away I took several courses in historic sites archaeology with Professor James R. Moriarty, historian, archaeologist, raconteur, and veteran of the Pacific campaign during the Second World War.

Dr. Moriarty and his merry band enjoyed access to Mission San Diego de Alcala and to San Diego’s Old Town, where we learned from him the discipline of the dig – excavating with soft brushes more often than with small trowels, and mapping everything, recording everything, labelling everything, photographing everything. With one slow, brief pass with a small blade one could find a Chinese coin, a fragment of a Spanish stirrup, human finger bones, and a good-sized chunk of glass from the headlight of a 1948 Hudson, all jumbled up by the accidents of history, gardening, and the busy actions of gophers.

This season’s gardening at my rural estate along Jasper County Beer Can & Garbage Dump Road 400 has been similarly rewarding in matters of archaeology, only without any human remains.

In tilling a little plot for the sunflowers I have so far found:

1. A Sylvania Blue Dot ™ flashbulb for photography, never fired. I don’t know how it got there. I don’t know how it survived heat and rain and frost for years. I don’t know how it survived the tines of the mechanical tiller two weeks ago.

2. A small hatchet head, possibly meant for camping, with part of the top deliberately curled by the owner for purposes unknown to me. Someone suggested a specialty modification by a roofer. An InterGossip search of Boy Scout hatches, box hatchets, roofing hatchets, and so on revealed nothing similar.

3. A fine collection of broken glass.

4. A finer collection of screws and nails of various sizes. Old people (cough) are given to saying, “They don’t make ‘em like they used to,” but it is true. Modern nails and screws are often degraded pot metal poured into molds in Shanghai. Old nails and screws are made of extruded steel wire, and even after decades in the earth are often more durable than the modern ****. I have a big magnet on a rope for searching for nails and other ferrous objects. Even if the found objects are not useful, I’ve saved the lawnmower blades. Several years ago I came up with a pocketknife, a good old Schrade-Walden rusted beyond use. I imagine its owner looked for it a long time before giving it up and going to Mixson’s Hardware or Sharbutt’s Feed Store to buy a new one, bemoaning the old one as better.

This summer I should, barring adventures with the weather and incursions by varmints, have a modest stand of sunflowers. Agricultural supply houses sell neat little gadgets for hulling them, and I might try that someday, but for now I harvest the heads, store them in that famous cool dry place, and put them out for the birds and squirrels in the winter.

As they grow, sunflowers are beautiful, which is its own reward. As heliotropes they follow the sun. Scientists and other Dr. Grundy types assure us that heliotropes don’t really follow the sun, that the sun’s rays stimulate cells that blah, blah, blah.

Any small child knows better – sunflowers follow the sun because they want to.

So there.

Life is good.

-30

The Darwinian Cat - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

The Darwinian Cat

For Pepper-Cat,
Who brought us a Rio Grande Leopard Frog
(Rana Berlandier)

But then, all cats are dour Darwinians
Students of the evolution of creatures
Sometimes with the eyes of good scholars, yes
But mostly by killing and eating them

They like gophers and green lizards the best
Careless cardinals and poor baby squirrels
But never snakes or scorpions or such-like pests
Or stringy, door-knocking evangelists

They eat little animals who hide in the wood -
They would eat Darwin too, if only they could!

Wednesday, April 15, 2020

They Say There's Some Sort of Bug Going Around - poem (of sorts)

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

They Say There’s Some Sort of Bug Going Around

Wuhan virus Chinese virus Bat virus
Corona virus Coronavirus
CoronaVirus Covid-19
COVID-19 SARS-CoV-2

Cure it? With what? Yet more war metaphors?
(Newark), they can’t even agree what to call it

Tuesday, April 14, 2020

Herd Immunity Properly Practiced - Poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

Herd Immunity Properly Practiced

One wishes for immunity to the herd
Freedom from the expectations of others
From being slotted and characterized
From the duty to be happily so

“Defined a generation” is a lie –
A man defines himself as he thinks best
Owing obedience only to God
(and traffic lights; let’s not get stupid, eh)

Otherwise, individual and free -
Oh,
If only everyone were just like me


Line 5 – “Man” and “he” are gender-neutral.
Line 11 – The irony is deliberate.

Monday, April 13, 2020

We Read Poems Because We Don't Know Poetry - poem (well, yes...)

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

We Read Poems Because We Don’t Know Poetry

Which sounds a bit too precious, but bear with me
Or hamster with me, to avoid a cliché
The sundial says, “The Best is Yet to Be”
And so it is, each word-rich summery day

If we take a page from the busy bee
Then every day is a summery day
Taking those dream-infused pages you see
Teasing each line our own, working away

We read poems because we don’t know poetry -
It’s all a matter of dreamility

Sunday, April 12, 2020

Squaddies Posted at the Tomb - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

What Happened to the Guards Posted at the Tomb?

Maybe the duty officer had it in for them
Some privates, a corporal, maybe a sergeant
Grousing about pulling a night watch
And in a Jewish cemetery – why?

No one agrees if they were temple police
Or Romans, for special duty detached
What time they were posted, how many there were
Or how into silence they were bullied or bribed

And no one much cares because

While heroes and saints get written up in books
Poor squaddies get only disapproving looks

Saturday, April 11, 2020

Couplets for Holy Saturday in the Virus-Time


Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

Couplets for Holy Saturday in the Virus-Time

Sure, there are empty churches, but then
There are equally empty men

And empty hearts in the Upper Room
But oh, tomorrow – an empty tomb!

Friday, April 10, 2020

Mrs. Pilate Posts a Bikini Selfie - poem

Lawrence Hall
mhall46184@aol.com
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com


Good Friday in the Virus-Time

“…forgotten as a nameless number on a list that afterwards got mislaid”

-Doctor Zhivago, p. 503

The Altar is bare; broken are the mysteries
Our Lord is buried deep within the pyx
A stone of shame is rolled against our hopes
The night is foul with evil whisperings

How do we know? It’s on the television
That’s all that's left to us – sharp images
Of Darwinians dancing on mass graves
While keeping a social distance of art

Mrs. Pilate posts a bikini selfie -
Broken are the mysteries; the Altar is bare