Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Eating Biblically
I’ve never felt that I was liable
To dine upon on a tasty bible
Thursday, May 21, 2026
Eating Biblically - doggerel
Where Words Matter More than Noise - poem
Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Where Words Matter More than Noise
As a wise friend says
“The unacknowledged legislators of the world” 1
Do not assemble in chambers of marble and oak
With speakers’ maces, in ermine-collared robes
Their speeches taken down by The Guardian and The
Times
But rather at corner tables at Kosher Sam’s 2
Café Zanzibar 3, The Stray Dog Café 4
With disposable pens, and in jeans and tees
Their speeches interrupted by each other
Ideas later sharpened into verse
And published in LogoSophia and Eliot’s HP 5
1 Shelley, “A Defence of Poetry”
2 San Diego
3 Nacogdoches (and can you spell “Nacogdoches?”)
4 St. Petersburg
5 LogoSophia and Hello, Poetry
Monday, May 18, 2026
Hello, You - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Hello, You
Hello, You
You, who have never written an idle line,
Give a second sunrise to each merry morning
Or if a morning is not permitted, a dusk
An hour of your gentle peace to read
Hello, You
You, who chant for us your litany of hope
We who are blessed in your thoughts and words
In how you shape chaos into hymns of love
And sing your stories to the universe
Hello, You
You, who have never written an idle line
Pray for all of us, please, at your Heliconian shrine
Landing at Port aux Basques - poem
Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Landing at Port aux Basques
“He was faithful and
daft to me”
-as Marc Antony did
not say
We were approaching Newfoundland aboard the old Caribou
I climbed up on deck in the icy, clear dawn
A mysterious woman in a Burberry coat
Smoked cigarettes in the lee of a ventilator
(and ignored me)
In the cold I surveyed the brown and white coast
And reported back to Dan that there was snow ashore
“You’re daft,” he replied, “those are just little houses.”
But there was snow indeed on Port aux Basques
We rattled Dan’s CRV up Highway 1
(driving around a
dead moose in the road)
On daft adventures all the way to Saint John’s
Dan is the only one who has ever called me
daft; indeed, except in the movies I have never heard anyone else use the term.
Saturday, May 16, 2026
The Flag and the Fourth Amendment flown at Half-Mast Down at the Post Office - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
The Flag and the Fourth Amendment flown at Half-Mast
Down at the Post Office
“VEHICLES AND THEIR CONTENTS ARE SUBJECT TO INSPECTION WHEN ENTERING, LEAVING, OR WHILE PARKED WITHIN THIS RESTRICTED AREA. ENTERING INTO THIS AREA CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE INSPECTION. (39 C. F. R. PART 232.1(b)(2)”
-a new sign screwed to the wall at my rural post office
The flag was flown at half-mast again today
As it often is for weeks at a time, it seems
A moment in history? A loss? A death?
Maybe another Texas senator or bird dog? 1
The flag was flown at half-mast again today
Some guy down the street flew it upside down
Protesting or surrendering or not paying attention
To the latest crisis in our decaying republic
The flag was flown at half-mast again today -
I wonder if now it will always be that way
1 A reference to a line in True Grit
Thursday, May 14, 2026
Life as a Noisy Waiting Room - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the
Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine
– A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Life
as a Noisy Waiting Room
“This waiting room of a world.”
-fictional line by the character of C. S. Lewis in Shadowlands
How much of life is passed in
waiting for others
To do what they promised they
would do:
The mechanic who promised to call
when the car was ready
The computer that promised your
package on Monday
The lawn service that promised to
mow on Tuesday
The friend who promised to meet
you on Wednesday
The pharmacist who promised your
meds for Thursday
The doctor’s appointment promised
for nine o’clock Friday
The cable service that promised repairs
by Saturday
Oh, sure, all those promises -
They
simply went away!
A Parasol Mushroom - senryu, possibly a haiku, possibly not
A Parasol Mushroom
A tiny white house
Appears on the lawn at dawn
But where is the toad?
To a child a mushroom is a toadstool. I have never seen a toad resting on or sheltering beneath a toadstool, but I keep looking. I imagine it would be rather like Bilbo Baggins, smoking a pipe and reading its morning letters.
What Time is it in Wal-Mart? - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the
Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine
– A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
What
Time is it in Wal-Mart?
And call to children in the yard
“What century is it outside?”
-Pasternak, “About These Poems”
My daughter gave me a nifty Apple
watch
But years have passed; it mostly
spends its time
On the charger, dreaming of
happier hours
When minutes joyfully leaped over
each other
I found my dusty Timex in a dusty
drawer
$8.00 at Wal-Mart a long time ago
(the
watch, not the drawer)
I fitted it with a new battery (I
can do stuff)
Its sweep hand leaps over its
painted dial
I passed some little children;
one of them hissed
“What is that curious thing on
that old man’s wrist?”
Tuesday, May 12, 2026
Kreeft, Tolkien, Dostoyevsky, and a Driveway Alarm - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Kreeft, Tolkien, Dostoyevsky, and a Driveway Alarm
Peter Kreeft: The Two Greatest Novels Ever Written:
The Wisdom of the Lord of the Rings and The Brothers Karamazov
I was yawning over my book late at night
When the driveway alarm squawked unimaginatively
In its mechanical voice, “DRIVEWAY ALERT!”
With guard-dachshund and flashlight I addressed the alert
But there was nothing, only the wind and damp
Perhaps a squirrel had triggered the alarm
Which is silly, because squirrels don’t drive
And shouldn’t be wandering around in the lane
I am yawning over my book again -
What are you reading at bedtime just now?
Sunday, May 10, 2026
In Monastic Solitude - poem
Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
In
Monastic Solitude
In monastic solitude I sat
Among the lilting liturgy of the
leaves
Vocalizing no prayers, thinking
no thoughts
Only trying to empty my poor mind
And listen to the Hymn of the
Universe
The blessings of bees, the
chantings of cicadas
The singing Silence of the spring-ing
sky -
But in all of this I was unsuccessful
And that’s okay
My mind is too cluttered to pause
and to be
But still, you see
I thought I heard You sighing in
the wind
Friday, May 8, 2026
The Distinct Click of a Zippo Cigarette Lighter - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
The Distinct Click of a Zippo Cigarette Lighter
A man
An old man
An old man slumped in a wheelchair
An old man slumped in a wheelchair outside the cardiac clinic
Smoking a cigarette
An old man smoking a cigarette, not the clinic
The clinic is not smoking in any way
While armed with smug looks of disapproval
We could pursue him with guilt and consequences
Along the disinfected corridors
Of offices, labs, and consulting rooms
Maybe even past the patch-painted corner
Where the cigarette machine used to be
And the pay ‘phone and the newspaper rack
But Bogart and the Marlboro Man are dead
A Zippo clicks as it did in his youth
Leave the old man smoking his past alone
Because he is alone, and because he is dying
And his cigarette is the only joy left to him
Wednesday, May 6, 2026
A Carpenter's Pencil - poem
Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
A Carpenter’s Pencil
For Gary Kirbow and The
Guys,
Brent, Jeff, and Sam
A carpenter’s pencil – a marvelous magical wand!
With a mystical mark, a thoughtful touch
Of the master craftsman’s weathered hands
It wondrously works visions into being:
Transoms, beams, joists, joins, rafters, cabinetry
Trestles, trusses, uprights, piers, stringers, walls,
Timbers, cornices, doors, lintels, moldings, mullions
Trim, frames, laths, panels, planks, sills, and studs
The master shapes them with an artist’s utensil -
The marvelous, magical carpenter’s pencil
(At this point Kirbow
will tell a naughty joke)
Doggie-Kisses - a poem about dogs
Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Doggie-Kisses
For all our little
domestic carnivorous quadrupeds
“Love anything, even
a small animal, and your heart will surely be broken.”
-C. S. Lewis
Her life is short, her nose is long
A dachshund’s bark is a merry song!
Her life is short, her body is long
And how her little paws pad along!
Her life is short, her ears are long
Her love is a happy ping to your pong
Her life is short, her tail is long
Her eyes are big, her heart is strong
Her life is short
But the memories –
O, the memories are long!
Death Comes for the Cardinal - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Death Comes for the Cardinal
While tending the tomatoes and peppers and such
I found the corpse of a cardinal – too much!
And my sweet little cat with a grin on her mug
Licking her paw with a ‘tude all smug
I’ve told all the birds to watch out for the cat
But they will dive-bomb her – rat-a-tat-tat!
And thus a brave cardinal or insolent bluejay
Will be snatched to its death on a sunny day
O, bold birdies, soaring down from the sky
Mind the claws lest you dive and die
Or as is said in Iberia, by every don and dona
Always remember - leave that cat alone, ya!
(Apologies to everyone in Catalonia)
A play on Death Comes for the Archbishop
Monday, May 4, 2026
The Drudge (POPUP) Report is (POPUP) Crushin’ (POPUP) Itself - not exactly a poem
Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
The Drudge (POPUP) Report is (POPUP) Crushin’ (POPUP) Itself
Ad with rotten teeth Ad popup with a tattooed lady (so to speak) Ad
with a skeleton and muscles exposed popup Hancock Whitney Jos. A. Bank HP Smart
popup Tank Lane Bryant Walking shoes for elderly with poor balance Explore
Dental Implant popup Prices HP Smart Tank Again popup Metal Barns The wooden popup
hummingbird is taking by storm! [Taking what? And why take a hummingbird popup house
by storm? Are they Nazi popup hummingbirds?] Logo Sportswear Relieves Shoulder
Pain for Good Jos. A. Bank again I Found Out Exactly What popup My
Dental Hygienist Uses to Whiten popup Her Teeth Garden Saving on TEMU Ad with rotten teeth Ad with a popup tattooed
lady (so to speak) Ad with a skeleton and muscles exposed Hancock Whitney Jos.
A. Bank HP Smart Tank Lane Bryant Walking shoes for elderly with poor balance
Explore Den[I think the content is squashed in about here…]tal Implant Prices HP Smart popu
Tank Again Metal Barns The wooden hummingbird is taking by storm! [Taking what?
Popup And why take a hummingbird house by storm? Popup Are they Nazi
hummingbirds?] Logo Sportswear Relieves Shoulder Pain for Good Jos. A. Bank
again I Found Out Exactly What My popup Dental Hygienist Uses to Whiten
Her Teeth Garden popup Saving on
TEMU
Upon Finding My Old Copy of PARADISE LOST - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Upon Finding My Old Copy of Paradise Lost
Sacred to the memory of Tod Mixson, Robert Conn, and Dr. Huston Diehl
Time will run back, and fetch the age of gold
-Milton, “On the Morning of Christ’s Nativity”
With notes by Dr. Diehl, of happy memory
And my poor scribbles in the hand of callow youth
As memories of Thursday nights with Robert and Tod
Fetch back a golden age when we were young
Styrofoamed coffee (and sometimes Scotch)
We fogged the air with our pipes and thoughts
“Umbrageous grots” and “snaky sorceress”
Became our private jokes in public places
But now
I pray that we will laugh again at “dismal universal hiss”
When someday all are freed from this silence cold
They hand in hand with wand’ring steps and slow,
Through Eden took thir solitary way.
-PL XII.648-649
If Everyone is Thinking Alike We Could be Correct - poem
Lawrence
Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
If Everyone is Thinking Alike We Could
be Correct
If you’re not taking target you’re not over the flak
It isn’t what it isn’t, the ice of the tipberg
You can’t pick your family but you can pick your nose
The early bird hops over to Cracker Barrel
What doesn’t kill you makes you weaker
We have an inactive shooter off scene
From an abundance of irresponsibility
The situation is fluid because, hey, it’s a drowning
Despite the dozens of dead it’s not terrorism
And, really, sometimes the room should read you
Indicted for the Treasonous Positioning of Seashells - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Indicted For the Treasonous Positioning of Seashells
Be careful, child, if you go down to the beach today
You’re a serious threat with your pail and spade
The Secret Service might come and drag you away
To their Star Chamber court where charges are laid
Your Minnie Mouse goggles make you look like a spy
Hiding torpedoes in your Little Mermaid float
You might be taken down by the F.B.I.
So all your fellow Commies had better take note
Thus for your freedom’s sake, don’t touch a pebble!
Lest you be imprisoned as a murderous rebel
Where my Parents Were on 29 April 1944 - poem
Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the
Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine
– A Pilgrim's Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Where
my Parents were on 29 April in 1944
"...and the war will be forgotten..."
Remarque, All Quiet on the Western Front
My mother was a young war widow
in Kingsville, Texas
Raising a child with no
assistance from the state
For her husband was only missing,
you see
And a Merchant Marine, and so
didn’t count
My father was breeching the gates
of Dachau
His tank destroyer was the
“Razzle Dazzle”
With a naked lady painted on the
side
Among the stench and smoke, the
dying, the dead
My father told me that someday
there would be people
Who would deny that such things
ever were
Cf.
602nd
Tank Destroyer Battalion
SS Muskogee
Some years
ago whatever authorities see to such things worked to remedy the neglect of our
Merchant Marine widows and so they received some small assistance at last.
Graduation Speech Soup - poem (sort of)
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
LogoSophia Magazine – A Pilgrim's
Journal of Life, Literature and Love
Variation
on a newspaper column I wrote years ago
Graduation Speech Soup
Add cliches’ to
tastelessness, stir, and microwave
“Dr. Ponsonby,
Mr. Snort, Ms. Bogdown, Trustees, Guests, Parents, Fellow Classmates:
"Woo-Hoo! Thank you for all for the honor of being here tonight and, like,
stuff. Woo-Hoo!
"My fellow
classmates. Well it's been a great 12, 13, or 14 years ha-ha. Woo-Hoo!
“Keep the torch alive to pass to a new generation with the
key that unlocks the road to the future follow your passion the unemployment
will follow woo-hoo we’ve been through some amazing times together make a
difference to thine own self be true woo-hoo commencement means a beginning not
an ending woo-hoo as we go forth life is a journey not a destination we made it
all the hard work we’ve put forth to this point in time as a great man said these
are the best time in our lives as one door closes another door opens as someone
says in the bible because a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single
step to make the world a better place trust your instincts you don’t find
education in books we are the future bright with promise some see the future
and ask why but we see the future and ask why not Habakkuk 2:7 woo-hoo we did
it I can’t believe we’re here believe in yourself live your dreams to be all
that you can be God has a plan for you woo-hoo we have the responsibility to
build a new world if opportunity doesn’t know build a door don’t follow the
path blaze a trail because there is no one like you because you are an
individual just like those other hundred or so people your age and all dressed
just alike because life is what happens while you’re making plans woo-hoo live,
laugh, love you have to look through the rain to see the rainbow dance like
nobody’s looking (even though they are, and they’re laughing at you) aim for
the moon and if you miss you’ll hit the moon (or something) life is not waiting
for the storm to pass it’s about dancing in the rain because you are a new
generation called to miss 100% of the shots you don’t take because we were all
one big family who have lived, laughed, and loved together hey and remember the
time (name) barfed on the stairs we’ll all that that shared moment to remember and
are we great or what praise Jesus together woo-hoo we can’t save all the
starfish but I can make a difference for this one because as a great man Robert
Frost said in “The Road Not Taken” we can make a difference for all the
starfish and hey let’s give up for Jesus for mandatory cheap applause because
someone said that someone said that someone else said that we can’t talk about
Jesus at graduation and someone talks about Jesus every year but we’re
courageous because we talk about Jesus in the sea of life woo-hoo today is the
first day of your rest of your life oh, the places you’ll go like maybe eternal
stasis in front of a MePhone because education is the gate that unlocks the key
to something I don’t know why they asked me to be the speaker ha ha shout-out
to Mom hey everybody wear sunscreen because your future’s so bright close your
eyes and remember when - hey, an air horn, that’s so cool, no one’s ever done
that before - woo-hoo I want to congratulate each and every one of you on your
incredible talents and abilities woo-hoo as you begin your journey to a bright
and shining future because we are the best class (name of school and a
shout-out to the mascot) has ever graduated (since last year) woo-hoo a dream is a wish your heart makes the road not
taken and you can become anything you dream to be or wish to be or something
#lifehack because she said she could do it and she did woo-hoo #hashtag now go
forth and make your lives exceptional woo-hoo although on Monday morning we’ll
wake up and realize we’re just more unemployed Americans.”
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