Mhall46184@aol.com
The Iowa Caucus:
“I’m Sorry, Dave; I’m Afraid I Can’t Do That”
From the Iowa Caucus we finally learn the nature of the H.A.L. in 2001: A Space Odyssey – it’s any computer used to record and tabulate our votes. It’s big, it’s expensive, it doesn’t do what it’s programmed to do, and it might kill democracy.
“I am completely operational, and all my circuits are functioning perfectly.”
The Iowa Caucus is a curious method for sorting out party candidates to run in general elections: it seems to consist of people moving around and then being counted. Odd, but it worked. Past tense. Some clever lads and their cliched electronic start-up – Shadow, Incorporated - developed an app (there’s always an app) to tally the votes electronically and sold this package of magic S.T.E.M. beans to the Iowa Democratic Party.
“I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.”
The Shadow reported no results for hours, and days later no one trusted the incomplete results it finally excreted. According to the rules of the game, the party candidates can go no further if they don’t have the numbers, and the numbers were spinning and tumbling in a void for days.
“…I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over. I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you.”
The Iowa Democratic Party sprayed the usual fog of cliches, evasions, and excuses: “clarity,” “coding error,” “transparent,” “modernize,” “new app,” “new backup systems,” “abundance of caution,” and blah-blah.
(https://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/news/elections/presidential/caucus/2020/02/04/iowa-democratic-party-delayed-caucus-results-should-soon-published/4659581002/)
“I know everything hasn't been quite right with me, but I can assure you now, very confidently, that it's going to be all right again. I feel much better now. I really do.”
When political parties mess with elections (a fine old Texas tradition; Iowa could learn from us), the challenge used to be corrupting, organizing, and silencing a number of people.
Altering ballots in a back room or making a physical ballot box full of paper ballots disappear (https://texasmonitor.org/missing-ballot-box-may-be-reason-for-vote-discrepancy-in-midland-county-election/) requires skill and good old-fashioned teamwork.
Making electronic ballots disappear, change, and dance on the grave of the Republic requires only one obedient techno-functionary and his laptop.
“This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it.”
No computerized voting, please. Let’s stay with paper ballots, each of which is counted by several tabulators and observers. If political parties, any of them, are going to steal our votes, let’s make them work for it.
-30-
No comments:
Post a Comment