Lawrence Hall
Dispatches for the Colonial Office
Sneeze Across Texas
(widespread respiratory infections in
Texas during Christmas 2025)
I would almost rather gnaw off an arm than endure what
passes for contemporary country music. By the Grace of God we will always have
the authentic work of Ernest Tubb. One of his best is “Waltz Across Texas.”
When we cough
together under Texas skies
It’s rather a
nightmare that has come true
And when you look at
me, with those red, rheumy eyes
I could sneeze
across Texas with you
Sneeze across Texas
with you and our virus
Sneeze across Texas
with you
Like a medical movie
ending but with no one to admire us
I could sneeze
across Texas with you
My rhinorrhea
just won’t be gone
The moment that you come in view
And with our soggy hankies we could wheeze on and on
I could sneeze across Texas with you
Sneeze
across Texas with you in my arms
Cough across Texas with you
Like a bad novel ending I'm semi-comatose in your charms
And I could sneeze across Texas with you
NB: “Waltz Across Texas” is the property of its
several authors, musicians, and copyright holders. Respect.
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