Monday, July 3, 2023

The Desperadoes of Silicon Gulch - weekly column 11 June 2023

 

Lawrence Hall, HSG

Mhall46184@aol.com

 

The Desperadoes of Silicon Gulch

 

One of the many advantages of reading a physical book is that when you open it to continue the narrative the typeface and layout have not been upgraded (snort) against your will into near illegibility, with the table of contents all messed up and the chapter headings hidden in a corner.

 

When in Chapter 3 you’re following noble Sheriff Rocky Manly as he sneaks up on the hideout of Butch Jawbone and his gang of unshaven desperadoes the action is not suddenly interrupted by an advertisement blocking the page.

 

When reading a book-on-dead-tree the story is not paused with three dots and a note to the effect that if you want to continue you’ll have to upgrade (that dirty word again) to “paid.”

 

On weekends and holidays the conflict between Sheriff Manly and treacherous outlaw Jawbone doesn’t freeze in place – it’s a book; it doesn’t require a signal from the expensive but fragile InterGossip service provider.

 

But the techno-tyrants don’t see it that way. The other day I opened my Antarctica  Off-Line mail server to find a blur of unfamiliar and less legible type shoved onto the Orwellian Telescreen as a jumble. It’s as if the knee-pants at corporate felt the need to justify their existence by taking a familiar, practical, and comfortable layout and messing it all up. This is what they call an “upgrade.”

 

The concept of “if it isn’t broke don’t fix it” does not obtain in Silicon Gulch.

 

There’s a space for comments on the purported upgrade, and you can write a (polite) suggestion and request a return to the previous dashboard, but you will be a voice crying in an electronic wilderness.

 

Not only will you never learn if Nellie from the Long Branch Sushi Saloon finally chose between Sheriff Manly and outlaw Jawbone, you might be a long time finding your electrical mail on the upgraded program.

 

-30-

 

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